Resentment

Thanks to Hashem as well as to a great deal of obsessive intention, humility and work on my part, my life is at a really great balance right now.

I don't need to go into the details. I've written before about how I'm feeling with family and work and even the opportunities to write and play music.

Every now and then I face people who feel resentment towards me because they are not in a comfortable place with their own balance either because the work is too heavy or because they personal mechanisms for dealing with it are not working for them.

I feel sorry at those times for those people and find myself wanting to help. (With two people in particular I see that trying to help will lead to my being burned and their continuing to be unhappy and unaware of my efforts to help.)

I think sometimes I feel guilty or embarrassed because I think that doing so will help them.

But it doesn't. It's only up to them to find ways to fix this... by changing the patterns in their lives, their hearts or through prayer and being open to help from Hashem.

I say all this with the recognition that Hashem could take this balance away from me, but hopeful that Hashem would also provide the tools to help me make sense of it.

And if I'm to be completely honest, I feel resentment when others resent me. This is their issue, not mine. My work is to separate myself from it just as much as they need to.