Postpartum Care

I'm currently reading Natural Health After Birth. It's a great book, discussing feelings and experiences that I thought were only mine. But now, I must say, the book also makes me feel sad and resentful.

During the pregnancy I had to search high and low for information, especially Jewish information, about Jewish or otherwise spiritual customs around pregnancy. It was hard to find and most of the people I know her could not be good resources.

Now I'm experiencing the same as I learn about what is available in other cultures and times for women postpartum.

In this country, at this time, it's all about getting back on your feet and back to work quickly. It's about receiving gifts to welcome the baby and it's about seeing if you can get family or friends to stay with you for a little while and hold the baby while you do other chores. (Or sometimes they do the chores while you hold the baby.) All of that is really good, and it's what I've been able to gratefully receive.

But there are rituals and standards that others have done that I knew NOTHING about. There's a lot about numerous countries keeping women really warm to help them heal. Had I known this right away, I might not be having some of the slight medical problems I'm having now. They could have been avoided.

There's postpartum massage. Do I really want to have to pay $90 to get one? Why don't we live in a culture in which it's just part of what postpartum women receive?

What about the herbs this book tells me about? Again, I have a few problems I need help with, but even if I knew how to leave the apartment with ND long enough to get what I needed, where would I go?

And rest... I keep pushing myself to do more. It's in my personality, but I wish there was a community of women who were authoritatively telling me to stop and that my body needs rest even if I can't feel it. I'm not trying to be a Superwoman, but I keep telling myself I need to do more and I wish someone would disagree.

There was a certain point, around Sukkot, during the pregnancy when I just utterly burned out of reading about pregnancy and birth, but I have to say that I wish I'd read this book before the birth. I would have set up some more things for myself. I'd like to think that by not having that I might be able to somehow be motivated to help others get more significant postpartum care. I just am not as comfortable with nurturing adults as I am with kids.