Many thoughts about the world, meditation, parenting, Judaism, pregnancy, teaching, cancer survivorship, moving from West Coast to East and more.

Thursday, June 14, 2007


This week has been INSANE. Oddly enough, I can't elaborate much. A lot has happened for us and for people around us. With one situation for a friend, it's too sad for me to write about publicly. And for us, we had a difficult situation that is basically over now but that really stressed us out. The one thing I'll say about it is that I'm really proud of how well we operated through it as a team, just in time for our anniversary this Sunday. (Keep watching for posts about that.)

The only thing I feel comfortable actually mentioning is along a similar level of intensity as the other things, which was that my supervisor called me at 10 last night to say one of my colleagues who works in the morning was hit by a car and in the hospital. I agreed to substitute. The substituting isn't a big deal except that I didn't get as much sleep as I would have liked, especially as I'm still fighting this cold. But a crash like that shakes everyone up.

Yesterday in the teacher's lounge we all got into a big conversation about cancer. After all, my assistant (and also the assitant of the person who was hit by the car) was there, the one whose fiance has it, and their wedding day would have been this Sunday. (Yes, the same as our anniversary), but they've postponed for now. During this conversation I learned about a colleague that I barely know... learned he had Hogkins just over a year ago. (This was before he was with the school.) And I came out to a few people who didn't know my history. Every time that happens -- which seems frequent lately -- I'm bursting with the desire to talk about it. I'm hoping to find another chance to chat with this guy before the school year totally ends next week.

Last Shabbat I read Cancer Made Me A Shallower Person. I haven't read any books about cancer since I was sick and I'm fine with that. But I really liked this a lot. The back of the book describes it as "irreverent and humorous." I don't know why, but that really ticks me off. Again, it fires me up for some reason I can't quite identify. Whenever I read that on a book I think, "Oh, this will be a rip-roaring hilarious book, not like those sappy, 'Roses are beautiful, life is precious and G-d is just terrific' books about cancer. No, this one will be FUNNY."

It was funny in places. Just the kind of thing to make someone say, "Wow, isn't she brave... to be funny through ALL OF THAT." Of course it was funny. It was a real person talking about a real experience. And real experiences come in many shades of emotion... not just harp music dramatically watching someone say their last words and die.

I liked the the book because I connected with it. Again, a regular person talking about the real feelings that come up, and doing so with the same personality she would have had even before her life was turned upside down.

I don't know how relevant any of this is right now, but I just really wanted to write SOMETHING on here this morning after this long week, and I had wanted to write about the book anyway. Good news is that we are getting a visit tonight through Shabbat from JR who is passing through town and whose blog is not up-to-date and I think he's keeping another one but am not sure now. I've been too swamped to read other people's... just show off my own to the world later.

Whatever... I need to get ready for work.

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